The Truth About Communication
Did you know that countless individuals struggle with the art of communication either with their spouse, children, co-workers, other family members, and friends? There are several different ways to communicate with others, but to ensure what you’re saying is received well and makes the intended impact on individuals often require assistance in effective communication. Without truly understanding the full range of components required to communicate well, you can run into various disagreements, misunderstandings, feel unloved, unseen, unappreciated, and disconnected from those you love and care about most in your life.
Moreover, misunderstanding the ideal way to communicate (which varies for each person and family unit) can lead you to believe several falsehoods about others as well as the situation as a whole. To help youth and family gain better communication skills, A New Child A New Earth has shed some light on this topic and revealed a few truths about communication. Keep reading to see what they are and how they can improve your ability to share your thoughts and feelings with others.
1. Communication is not only about what you say
Quite often, many people feel its only about WHAT you say, yet there are other factors at operating during a conversation, and that is, HOW you say something, WHY you are saying what you are saying (your intention/agenda behind the words), your body language, and one that is often missed is all the non-verbal communication that is also taking place in a conversation. Which we refer to as Quantum Communication. It is all about what you are NOT saying as well as what you ARE saying. It is the intangible dialogue in the room while the conversation is happening. Each of these elements makes up the true art of communication. Understanding this full spectrum of true communication components will positively change your relationships more than you may expect. On the other hand, if you believe communication is only verbal, and are unaware of the impact of the words you choose, the tone of your communication, and the energy and body language that accompanies the words you say you leave a large part of the conversation off the table.
2. You’re loved ones need explanations and clarifications too
It is often assumed that loved ones should know what you mean without spelling it out for them. But the problem with this is that you expect others in your life to “get you” without explaining to them how you feel, what you think, and what you need. If this is your thought process when communicating with your family or loved ones, you may often be making incorrect assumptions and coming to incorrect conclusions about the other person and the situation as a whole. You will often begin to create narratives in your head about those you love and wish to connect with that can lead you further away from your loved ones than closer together.
3. Location, timing, and tone matter
There is often a more beneficial place, time, and tone for genuine effective communication. There is no hard and fast rule on it, but it can be extremely helpful if these conditions are discussed and adhered to. For example, do not try to have a deep and meaningful conversation with someone when they are exhausted, like at the end of a long day. Similarly, if they are stressed with other matters or if there are circumstances pre-occupying their minds causing them to be less than fully present with you this may also be a time to hold off on communicating matters that need their full attention and focus. Similarly, when you want to communicate it may be helpful to choose a quiet more private intimate space and location that offers little to no opportunity for distraction or interruptions. Public places are generally not ideal for big topics and deep heavy discussions to take place and be truly effective. Discussing what the ideal locations and times are can be very helpful when possible.
4. Listening is an important part of communication
You’ve heard it said before God have us Two Ears and One Mouth for a reason and that is so we can listen More than we speak. One aspect most people fail to grasp is the role that effective listening plays in communication. Having effective listening skills is as important as your ability to articulate what you are feeling, thinking, and wanting to convey. When you establish effective listening skills, you require fewer words to speak your mind, and you have a better opportunity to feel heard and understood. Effective listening takes many aspects about you into account and goes beyond the words you say.
If you continually feel misunderstood by your loved ones, family, friend and co-workers or struggle to convey what you are thinking, feeling and wanting to convey reach out!
For more details on how to improve your communication, reach out to A New Child A New Earth. I am an ACC Accredited Youth and Family Life Coach, certified through the “ACSTH” approved Kid’s Coaching Connection Program by the International Coach Federation. I offer life coaching for children, parents, caregivers, and organizations. I teach coping strategies, emotional intelligence, empowerment, and communication, so you can take charge of your life and make the impact that you dream of making.